Why Have You Forsaken Me?

My God, my God why have You forsaken me? Why are You so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? O my God I cry by day, but you do not answer, and by night but find no rest." -the words of a broken man.

The excerpt, of course, is the first two verses of Psalm 22. Recently, God put it on my heart to study this psalm.

At a prayer meeting one time, I heard a woman pray, "God, we're not supposed to cry. You hate it when we cry. You command us to rejoice!"

God commands us to rejoice?! If so, what does "rejoicing" look like? Is "rejoicing" walking around forcing a happy smile when inside we feel miserable and want to bawl our eyes out? Many people I know think that. When I heard that woman pray that, my heart broke. I got angry! Who told her that lie?! It was like she was saying that God is this gestapo that comes to you as you're bawling your eyes out and says, "Rejoice! What's wrong with you?! Suck it up, buttercup!" And yes, I know what Philippians 4:4 says, but is it actually just a command?

We can think it is! When we go to church we almost can feel guilty about showing our true emotions sometimes. I've felt this way especially in ministry.
People walk up to me and ask, "Hey Steve, how's it going?"
First words out of my mouth: "Good!" I force a smile at them.

There were times when I said that and I felt horrible! I had a sleepless night, a stressful week, a stubborn student in ministry not listening to me, financial woes, car problems, the list has gone on. Why didn't I just tell them?! I would have times of prayer with God in the midst of times like this: "Dear God, thank you for today..." when in reality I was not feeling that! So why didn't I tell Him that?! WHY?!

YES trials can mold us and shape us and YES God can use them, but sometimes what we forget is that GOD is NOT just LORD, but our LOVING FATHER! You know what His tone is in saying the words, "Rejoice in the Lord always, again I say rejoice?" It is this: He gently puts His hand on our shoulder, looks at us with the most compassionate eyes imaginable as we are bitter and weeping and says, "I'm your Dad, I love you, and I'll get you through this. Rejoice!"

I'm not going to lie, but when I think about that, it brings tears to my eyes.

Because we've all had times in our lives when we've felt horrible! David WAS feeling horrible as he was writing this and yet it is in the Bible as one of the most popular psalms. One of the main examples, of course was that through the poetic imagery he was using, he was describing Jesus on the cross. When he wrote the words, "they have pierced my hands and feet" (v. 16), historically speaking crucifixion wasn't even invented yet as a form of execution. So what does that mean?

God used this broken man, that's what it means. David was just expressing his heart to God, but GOD was using HIM to explain to the WORLD that ultimately THIS WILL BE JESUS.

Jesus,
the God of the universe who became a man.
A broken man of sorrows,
bearing the wrath we deserve.
He
was
forsaken.
David felt forsaken,
Jesus was forsaken.
We feel forsaken,
Jesus was forsaken.

And because of that, in Christ we are NEVER forsaken. Toward the end of that psalm, David's tone changed to words of PURE PRAISE to God. We are supposed to praise and rejoice in God, yes! If I sounded like I was contradicting myself, I was not. We are supposed to and He does command it, BUT God at the same time allows us to come to Him as real people! We can come broken, bitter, and weeping and God does not condemn us, but embraces us as a loving Father embraces His son who just fell off a bike and is crying over a scraped knee. I don't know about you, but that God deserves to be rejoiced over.

So let's come to Him!

No Music?!

My brother told me about this composer named John Cage who wrote a song simply titled "4'33"". The song is incredibly abstract. Some would call it a waste of time and talent and others would call it pure genius. Basically it is 4 minutes and 33 seconds of absolute silence. What is even crazier is that this piece does have movements as well. First of all, the music piece shows that there is no complete silence and that everything is music. In the video you'll hear the hum of electricity, people coughing (especially between movements), and much more. It also teaches we the listeners to be still and listen, something that is easy to do when music is playing, but very hard to do when nothing is happening.

The announcers in the video after the piece described the environment as "tense". Like I said before, being still is easy to do when music is playing because it allows your mind to work on something. You can think on lyrical content, an amazing guitar solo, the harmonies sung, and much more. In church settings nowadays, music is CONSTANTLY being played. There is always noise and something happening, especially at youth services I've been to. They even feel a need to play music when an altar call happens because it helps "set the moment."

Now, I am someone who loves music. I love listening to music when I'm working, writing, cleaning my room, hanging out with friends, whatever. God initially used a band named 12 Stones to help bring me to Him. However, it can be so easy for people, especially me, to get so consumed by music that we forget about the world around us.

This can be seen especially in gyms. A friend of mine who goes to Cardio Express told me once that he noticed practically everyone around him had earbuds on, listening to something while they were working out. In my experiences working at Sports Authority I've seen customers wearing earbuds while they're shopping. A student I see regularly at Eastern plays pool with a group of friends while wearing earbuds. He rarely talks to them as a result.

It got to the point where I as well could not go a day without listening to some form of music. I feel like I always have a song stuck in my head. Whenever I'm going through a trial, I even find myself going through my internal music library trying to find songs describing situations I've been through. At times it is comforting, but is it always right?

Recently, I felt it strongly put on my heart to take an extensive break from listening to music. I took off the cover of my stereo so I couldn't listen to the radio on my way to/from work, and did not access my iTunes library. I found myself bored sometimes, especially when driving. I was annoyed at times too, because I could hear noises I was trying to shut out, but couldn't. I even found myself making up my own music: singing songs, beatboxing, drumming on the steering wheel, etc. I even started playing my guitar again! (Not while I was driving, of course.)

More importantly, though, it caused me to pray much more. I found myself reciting more scriptures: some I haven't looked at for awhile and others I was trying to memorize. I also heard God speak to me much more as well. American society can be so LOUD that it can be hard to get quiet and hear that "still small voice" (1 Kings 19:12).

Is it possible to get quiet before God?

Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!"

So it is possible...I think about when in Mark 1:35, Jesus got up early in the morning before the sun came up (probably around 4am), and went to pray. Back in those days, it must have been so quiet. No hum of car engines, no televisions, no music, no airplanes, nothing. He probably just heard his heartbeat and the blood pump in his head. Jesus got that quiet, and as Christians I think we should make time to get that quiet: where there is no music, no crowds of people talking, no television blaring, but just you and God.

Will you do that? Try it out...

God bless you,

Steve

Confessions of a Recovering Facebook Addict

"THE WAGES OF SIN IS DEATH." (Romans 6:23)

Recently I decided to take a break from Facebook for 40 days. I found myself in a bit of a dry spell with God, and one of the things I literally felt consumed by was Facebook. It felt like my thoughts, my time, everything revolved around it. I couldn't work at home without checking it every five minutes, and I constantly had thoughts of: "Hey, this could make a cool status update..."

Whether it was to check my profile, change my picture, post status updates, view other people's status updates, or even spy on "friends" I haven't talked to since high school (some even elementary school), I could only imagine how many countless hours I wasted being consumed by it.

It got to the point where even when I just typed in the "www." in my web browser, it automatically guessed as a first choice that I'd be going to Facebook. My last weekly Covenant Eyes report before the break said I went to Facebook.com over 1,000 times in one week! I don't know about you, but I had a serious problem. It consumed me. It was hard going even a day without it.

That's what idols do. They consume you. They KILL you.

I find that when people pour out their entire lives for something other than Jesus, and it can be anything: sports, their job, music (I'll get to that one later), sex, whatever, it will leave you feeling empty and drained. Idols demand lots from you and give absolutely nothing back but a temporal, worthless high.

Facebook consumed me. Does it consume you? If it doesn't, then you can easily walk away from it. If you can't imagine your life without it, it's time for a break.

When people pour out their lives for Jesus, they find rest. Living for Jesus is hard, but pouring ourselves out for Him is the best thing you can do. Nothing compares to it. That's what He wants and that's what we need. If we pour ourselves out to other things: caffeine, Facebook, friends, social situations, etc. we will get drained. We will not be satisfied. We will be consumed. We will be slaves. We will be killed. We will be EMPTY!

By the grace of God I saw my flaw. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not anti-Facebook. As of today, I'm actually back on Facebook. Facebook can be a very valuable tool when used for the glory of God. It can also be even more valuable when Christ is at the center of how we the users view it. Yes, those are separate things. Remember, God can glorify Himself through a thought provoking status update, even though it was not initially used with the purpose of glorifying Him (God is really sovereign like that).

Does that also mean that one needs to only post "super duper spiritual" Bible and sermon things? No, I don't think so. People have personalities. It's okay to have funny things posted, but as long as Christ remains the center of them in your heart, soul, mind, and strength when you post them. Is Christ the center? Because everything is about Him. It's not just about commandments, but about Him.

So in regards to Facebook, I am still recovering. I can still be prone to idolatry again, because though I'm dead to sin, I still wrestle with it. I am not over this by a long shot, but I have just made a first step. I also rejoice, because in Christ I am not a slave to sin, but free in Christ (who I'm now a slave to, by the way).

One amazing thing about Jesus is that we can come to Him how we are, no matter the sin struggle. That verse I quoted at the beginning of this post has an end: "...BUT THE FREE GIFT OF GOD IS ETERNAL LIFE IN CHRIST JESUS OUR LORD."

Thanks for reading, being my friend, praying for me and standing by me.

God bless you,

Steve

Do you struggle with an idol? Check and ask God: "Search me and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting." -Psalm 139:23-24